26 November, 2009

Black Friday... ain't no way!

The busiest shopping day of the year is supposedly the day after Thanksgiving. Coined by merchants themselves, or the media, the term "Black Friday" means it's a day that spells profitability for retailers.

The busiest shopping day, eh? That's my cue to stay as far away as possible from stores the day after Thanksgiving. Remember, I have been very supportive of Wal-Mart—except in cases where they actually drive stores out of business. They capture such a large percentage of the shopping public that it makes it possible to shop in relative privacy at other stores. I don't want to fight off crowds, stand in long lines, and put up with traffic congestion to save a few bucks... or even a hundred.

So to me the "Black" in "Black Friday" means something dark, menacing, and totally to be avoided. Walking along the beach at Hilton Head, where you will usually find us the day after Thanksgiving is far more inviting indeed. And like my I'm Not Shopping at Wal-Mart Guarantee, where you get a $100 and the chance to push five shopping carts into my car, I'm offering an I'm Not Shopping On Black Friday Guarantee as well. Yes, catch me shopping anywhere on Black Friday and earn the same guarantee. Double it if it happens to be at Wal-Mart.

Now excuse me, I have an ocean waiting.

~PITTSBURGH starts with PITT!~

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